What is a Masquerade?
There are a number of definitions:
- A false show or pretense.
- The wearing of a disguise.
- Pretend to be someone one is not.
- Be disguised or passed off as something else.
Where do we see Masquerades?
This post is not about Halloween! An AI search on the internet will easily provide information about its origins. This post is about our personal masquerades. Mainly, the masquerades some of us feel necessary for success. It is about our masquerades in the world around us, in business or in the church or group we may attend, but mostly about those masquerades covering the shame we have buried in our hearts. I'll try to express what I have to say in one post, so I'll use myself as an example and start with my "true confession."
My Masquerade
True confessions are dangerous you know. They are dangerous because we have to admit the truth about ourselves. Some people will turn them back against us. As long as the truth about who we think we are is buried in our hearts, we can go about our lives masquerading, that is, pretending to be someone we are not.
Me? Throughout my life, I have judged everything and everyone. I realize now that my judgment was mainly in defense of myself. It was rooted in fear. You know the story. The little guy wins over the big guy by throwing the first "sucker" punch. My punches weren't physical. They were my words, but they still defended me!
Where did this way of life come from? Well, I was abused as a child. Kenny Huffman beat me up on the playground in fifth grade. I was a fat kid and ridiculed for it. My Dad died when I was 14 and didn't teach me how to be a man. My mother was controlling and abusive. I learned to hate injustice, particularly when it pertained to me. I could go on but I'm sure you can see the excuses. These reasons really are excuses! Yes, maybe there was some validity in my responses to my life experiences, but mostly they were excuses that caused me to masquerade and hide from the shame in my heart. They formed the shame that became my identity! Not who I really am, but who I thought I was.
Today, I know there are some things I fear, but I'm I don't like to tell anyone. Why? Because some people will respond like Job's friends in the first book written in the Bible. All but one of his friends came to him during his suffering to point out the popular religious opinion that sin caused the suffering in his life. This may have been true, but the environment in which he lived created a lot of shame for not being perfect! The last person that came, however, rightly told him that he needed to follow God's will to be restored, loving and praying for others in other words. He did and He was!
Why Stay in the Masquerade?
For myself, it has been a life-long story. I hated the person I was. There was only human love in my heart for others, but very little of that for myself. Success was always distant, even though I worked and schemed to achieve it. It was all about me! So, I judged everyone and everything to make me feel better. My demeanor was always disguised as I pretended to be like the ones I thought were the good guys. In my business, I had to be the best. In my personal life, I had to be the life of the party. Like some of the world around me, family and children were second place to me. I was on the throne to protect me from others knowing who I thought I really was.
When I became a Christian, I worked to be the best Christian. To serve at a church more than others. To be more spiritual than others. To read my Bible more than others. To win more people to Jesus than others. To memorize more scripture, to have more spiritual gifts and on and on. Still, even with shame and all of its manifestations hidden in my heart, I thought my masquerade would make me a success.
I remember an old song by The Platters in 1955 titled, "The Great Pretender." This is who I was! Here are a few lyrics:
Oh-oh, yes, I'm the great pretenderPretending that I'm doing wellMy need is such, I pretend too muchI'm lonely, but no one can tell
Oh-oh, yes, I'm the great pretenderAdrift in a world of my ownI played the game but to my real shameYou've left me to grieve all alone
Too real is this feeling of make-believeToo real when I feel what my heart can't conceal
I know this was written as a lament for a lost love partner. The truth be known, these lyrics typify the masquerade some of us live in! I know I did!
Will the Real Person Please Stand Up!
I was not created by God to be a pretender! Neither were you! The Bible tells us when we accept Jesus as our Lord and Savior, we are His workmanship created in Christ Jesus (Eph. 2:10). Jesus became my Savior when I accepted Him in my heart. Learning to make Him my Lord has been a long process however. In fact, I'm still seeking Him to help me be free of what life made me to be.
Jesus Christ created the way for us to be like Him when He died on the cross and cried out "It is finished." The problem we all face is that the devil has worked overtime in our lives to try to make Jesus a liar. So we masquerade, hoping somehow we will be supernaturally conformed to His image. It doesn't work that way!
We have to build a foundation, and that is being willing to love others as Christ loves us, no matter what. Faith doesn't work unless there is a foundation of love (Gal. 5:6). We can't get past the wounds the devil and the shame in our hearts have inflicted without learning to love others with God's love, even our enemies. Not human love which so easily turns to hate, but God's love (1 Cor. 13). This is who we were created to be! I'm still seeking God to help me finish the course!
So, should we have regret for all the ungodly things we have done or experienced in our lives? Protect your chin from dropping to the floor. No! The Apostle Paul said to count our trials and tribulations all joy! They should be opportunities to learn and grow in Christ. I am learning to be grateful for the good times, and even some of the bad! I'm still processing who I am, but all my trials and tribulations have helped me to know who God created me to be, and to begin to get free of shame. The fine tuning, so to speak, is focusing on Jesus, receiving revelation of what God has said, and putting what we learn into practice.
Am I am free of the masquerades in my life? Yes and no! God has given me freedom in Christ Jesus. Am I trying to appropriate and practice it every day? I'm asking Jesus for daily revelation of His Word by the Holy Spirit. But the road to Calvary is long and difficult. Will we ever be totally free? Yes, either here on earth or in heaven by the Grace of Jesus Christ! While we are alive, we get to choose our way and exercise free will like God intended. I'm choosing eternal life now, and hereafter, in Jesus Christ. Actually, I'm choosing freedom from the great masquerade! What is your choice?
(For more information on how shame influences our lives, Tim Fletcher has a great series on YouTube.)
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